Theresa May’s Skirt

Tuesday, March 12th, 2013

It’s hard not to pull another ‘Theresa May or may not’ pun in light of this week’s news, but I think we can all be pretty confident that impartiality will not play a part in her ‘what works study’, and so we might be best steering away from language that implies an absence of foregone conclusion. After all, “The Government does not believe there is a case for fundamentally rethinking the UK’s approach to drugs”, and despite the recent peer review which suggested otherwise, “a royal commission is simply not necessary” (with ‘simply’ here meaning ‘in my opinion, and I hold a position of great power, so frankly the rest of you can go fuck yourselves’).

It doesn’t sit comfortably with me making the point that Theresa doesn’t have children of her own, as it drives me mad that every prominent female figure has their personal life and physical appearance analysed, while their male counterparts can walk around looking like someone ran over their fat faces, sticking bits of themselves into anything that will let them (and some things that don’t), and no-one bats an eyelid or feels the need to pass comment. However, on the issue of drugs, I can’t help thinking that being a parent might make Theresa somewhat less glaringly out-of-touch with what is happening on the street, if ya get me, blood. If she had a teenager with friends on Facebook that used words she didn’t understand, or had to carefully vet nights out to ensure none of those state school kids were going to be at this dance – or even, god forbid, had a child who disclosed cannabis use but hadn’t developed schizophrenia or grown another set of arms in their sleep (probably for stealing) – she might be less focused on figures showing heroin and crack use to be at their lowest levels, and more on the scary prevalence of ‘legal highs’.

However, her claim that she will “review new evidence of what works in other countries” is nothing more than an exact word-for-word restating of a commitment made in her 2010 drug strategy. It is not hard to see through the flimsy smokescreen that this is, in fact, a statement that they are going to do nothing – other than funding some Lib Dem to go on a jaunt, despite better evidence being available via academic studies on the internet. (“Best send one of theirs, David – gets one of them out of the way for now, focuses the matter on opinions instead of hard facts, and means we can completely ignore his findings whilst avoiding those ghastly ‘party divided’ headlines.”) The action falls short of offering anything that wasn’t already promised three years ago, but is released as a news story for no other reason than to spin some yarn that the Government is doing something, anything, in response to public and peer pressure to genuinely review drug policy.

You might think it’s a clever skirt, Theresa, but us plebs aren’t quite a thick as you might like to think. Nice legs though, love.

6 comments on “Theresa May’s Skirt

  1. Ruthiepoo says:

    WHAT?!?! A Tory Minister that is out of touch and doesn’t seem to care?? I’m shocked. Shocked and appalled. Great post though, yet again. Would like to hear more about how the transition to writer is going!

    • I know, unbelievable isn’t it. Appeasing the masses with bullshit until after the next election – and I thought politicians were decent, honest folk with the people’s best interest at heart.

      Thanks for reading though, and for your feedback – I will certainly take your comments on board, and have a think about how to represent my personal progress without giving away my identity and getting myself sacked in the process. 🙂

  2. jamie. says:

    ……And what’s more- how is this capitalism??
    Surely their job -the tories- is to manage the market place not control it- it is obvious for the last god knows how long there has been an opportunity regs supply and production and left unmanaged has become a massive criminal industry- arguably resultant in the greatest amount of social and economical damage . Again we still face the misguided notion among the leaders of the country that drug use equals crime and deprivation. This seems an outdated tabloid headline and something that just doesn’t ring true..The underground nature of drug use is very obviously the root of most problems, the very essence of illegality and the war on drugs leads to massive spends in customs ,police time and health..if drug policy is properly rethought the savings will probably enable us to keep a load of nursing and other public services and the profit, if we were to take the business away from organised crime would ,I imagine be more than enough to fund all manor of drug treatment services, drugs ed for yp’s and recovery as a holistic community model.
    I think in Uraguay the gov have had enough trying to fight organised crime and instead have decided to produce and sell their own weed, but hey it maybe that they are taking the problem and the health and wellbeing of their ‘plebs’ seriously.I certainly expect the tories to look after a small section of society and passify the rest as recent history seems to suggest..Next time one of your family get mugged by a crack head Theresa , you had the power ,unlike us ,to be proactive and stop it happening,

    • You’re not wrong, last week she was being dubbed ‘The Iron Lady In Waiting’, which made me think, oh jesus, please no. We haven’t got over the last one yet!

      A bit of a moral and political dilemma – she is a Tory and has little clue about many topics close to my heart, and yet she works hard, admits to being a feminist and is a woman. How does my little brain resolve all these ideas so that I can pigeonhole her in an over-simplistic manner I can cope with?! Argh!

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